i don't like sucking hair
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
