I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
