we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
