Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
