Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Randomize
