he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
