I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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