At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
