I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
