im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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