This dress was meant to end up on your floor
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Sacagawea was the original milf.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize