There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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