i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize