fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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