I must be too annoying 4 u.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
