Those balls look pretty dangerous.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
