i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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