they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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