just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
