Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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