After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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