how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize