Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
