margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
