I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
