Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
no you cant smoke seaweed
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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