well you can't waste a boner
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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