i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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