she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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