it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize