I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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