I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize