Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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