You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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