This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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