My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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