she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
accomplished twins. life is a go
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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