flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize