I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Panties = found
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
