My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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