i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
