I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I can text with my tongue
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize