I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
