Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I touched a dick in church today
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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