PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
