My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
