I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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