i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
