after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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