we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
