hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
