i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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