She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
